Heat

It has turned very hot up here. In the 80's. Mom thinks she'll be dismissed from rehab tomorrow and come home.

I bought pansies and petunia's and planted them in the windowbox which is in the only shady spot around this trailor.

I've also ordered a bouquet for Mother's Day.

I've told my guy I'd like to move back in with him in June. Somehow I feel better having that arranged.

Then, I'd like to come up here with mom every two months or so for a month. To spend time with her before she dies.

These choices are sort of relational choices. Ones I've made in relation to other people's needs and desires. I wish I knew what I'd like to do, just for myself, with no reference to other people. Sounds both selfish and healthy.