Sunday, September 02, 2012

Everything's Just Peachy

 Bought this little parcel of 6 local peaches last week at the farmer's market.  You can see the price!  Love the little paper bag bowl she tucked them into.  And yes, they were delicious.  I thought of my brother as he was longing for peaches in July, before they were harvested, so he never got any.

Set up a new shrine area for Ganesh.  The elephant remover of obstacles.  On top shelf a votive candle holder.  Below a bowl for water and bowl of peanuts for Ganesh.  Vase of flowers.  I have had a hard, in terms of stress, August.  So sad about my brother.  Inundated with paperwork and many details re: Probate.  At times I think I can't do this and will have to hire a lawyer.  But so far I have worked through the fears and uncertainties as to proceedures.

And now my son is angry with me as he wanted to move right into my brothers house which he had begun to clean.  It was filthy and chaotic in there.  But the fridge doesnt work, nor the hot water heater, the sink leaks, the chimney needs cleaning.  It is not liveable at the moment.  Plus other issues.  Plus I have barely just been named executor by the probate people, much less being able to make so many decisions and choices so quickly.

Remember I am a libra and given to dwell on things, debating pros and cons.  More a type B person than type A.  I do not rush is my motto though with Probate I have to conform to their dates and deadlines.

So I am either doing probate work, or trying to organize my brother's papers or trying to clean up the house and take loads to dump or thrift store just about every day.

That's why I am not posting much.

It is a fun challenge.

Love, Suki

37 comments:

Katiejane said...

I'm wishing you well in sorting out the probate stuff. I hired a lawyer, as there was so much personal property that had to be transfered to my name. Too much for my mind to work out.
It is a slow process. Mine took a year. It will all be done in time. No hurry.
Great deal on the peaches and they look so yummy.

Lynn Cohen said...

O My Goodness...what a mess, but you sound up for the job! I wish you well and lots of patience in this Suki. I hope your son continues to help sort through the mess and is understanding as to the hurdles one has to go through for probate. Did you know your brother's house was in such disrepair when he was living there?
How sad that is.
I'm sorry he did not get his peaches. But I am overjoyed that you get to enjoy the rich, sweet fruit (of life!)...hugs, xoxo

Mystic Meandering said...

Hope you are getting some inner silent time at your altar to help you through this. That's what helps me with life's challenges, going deep inwardly to the heart of Silence... So far I have not had to go through the probate system. I can imagine it is mind boggling. I'm sure it feels overwhelming... Maybe your son could help with the repairs on the house? It's interesting that family can be so obnoxious during these times :) Hang in there! One day at a time...
Love, C

Cris, Artist in Oregon said...

I had to go thru probate. I had to use a Lawyer..and they take so much of the money too. Good for you to be able to do it. Hope you get thru it all. Yes did you know how bad the house was? Sad he let it go so badly.

Tess Kincaid said...

Sending good thoughts, dear friend. I grilled some peaches this week outside on the BBQ...oh so wonderful...

Chris said...

May the image of the stability of an elephant's feet planted firmly on the ground lend your tasks the clear vision of what you must do next and next and finally, in the right time, seeing all cleared away to make way for what follows.

Robin said...

Suki, this sounds like a huge task for you....BUT...you ARE getting it done! I am so proud of you. Every day will you will see things (and not just the house) a little clearer. You are no longer living in *Limbo*..and can go forward with your life.

Your son will get over his anger and see the wisdom in waiting until the house is cleaned and in running order before he moves in.

Those peaches look heavenly! They remain one of my favourite fruits! And like Tess, they are delicious grilled! Chris and I did that in Santa Fe this year...a great accompaniment with chicken!

Sending you strength and calm,

Love to you and Bibitty,

♥ Robin ♥

p.s Your Ganesh Alter is lovely!

kimmie said...

Lovely peaches - and at a great price! yum!

I am the sam as you as far as "don't rush me" is concerned - I hate that kind of pressure - but it sounds like you are plodding through it all just fine. A little like the tortoise and the hare with your son perhaps?

~Babs said...

All in good time.
A lot to do,,,lots of brainpower needed, but as you say, no big rush. I hate being rushed too,,,especially in things of such importance.
We've had a few good peaches this year, but not at such a good price!
Excellent!

soulbrush said...

This is really interesting- not the peaches- altho they look delishus, but the 'house' project. I hope it will remain enjoyable for you Suki, and btw I took the word verification off my blog as a few people were complaing about it.

glitz said...

Hi Suki,
I love to see the way you are taking the beauty and adding it to your days - even though they are tough ones. Sometimes we all just have to plough through cr*p, but there's nothing to stop us pausing to smell the roses along the way.
Family relationships are so complex, aren't they?
Your shrine is beautiful - may Ganesh bring you blessings.
Arohanui, Lesley.

Mim said...

Oh my, like others we hired a lawyer to help us thru probate, and it took over a year. Ridiculous really. Interesting that your son wants to move into he house, he'd be close to you then.
Good luck with this Suki, the process can try the patience of a saint!

sukipoet said...

If I hire a lawyer, I will definitely have to move out of the trailer as it will have to be sold to pay the lawyer. There are other complications too. I dont want to be homeless.

Umā said...

I love your Ganesh shrine, Suki. When I had Dr. L read my birth chart this summer he and I were both very happy to find that Ganesh is the deity I should worship! He likes offerings of fresh green grass too, btw ;)

One step at a time with probate and the house. And I agree, it will be much easier to get the place straightened out with nobody living there. I don't know how old and demanding the house is but I know all too well what it's like to say, "we'll get to that problem later" while doing triage on some other issue that's come up and things get let go. If anyone inherited this house they would probably curse me, but doing never-ending home repair hasn't turned out to be the highlight of our lives, lol.

Keep taking time to enjoy the fruits of this beautiful season!

Annie said...

Suki, I love Ganesh!
Slow and steady is the way to go, one task at a time, staying in the moment.
Of course you miss your brother, you always will, how can it be otherwise? It's okay.
You will get through this.
Big hugs and much love.
xoxo

Kelly M said...

If you need a little bit of cheaper help at certain junctures, consider a paralegal. I went through one for my second divorce and the service was better (and MUCH cheaper) than with a lawyer on the first one.

Thinking of you... K

sukipoet said...

thanks Kelly. the book on being an executor i have says you dont need a law degree to do probate.

however, yes, i would like some legal advice. thanks for the tip. but dont paralegals work out of lawyer offices.?? or can you find them elsewhere.

studio lolo said...

Suki, first let me say I'm sorry you're having a hard time with the loss of your brother. Grief (as you well know) has many stages. I know you're processing his passing at the pace you can handle. The same goes with what you're left to deal with. All in good time. Try to take the stress out of it.
I love that you have an altar to sit by.

I'm wondering if there are retired people that give advice for free, like the folks at SCORE. They're the ones who give business advice for folks starting a business.

I'd ask at your local senior center of the council on aging. You'd be surprised at what you can find by asking.

I hope your son comes around and finally "sees" the whole picture. It's not just a matter of one person leaving the house and another moving in. I'm sure you've explained this to him over again though. I hope he does help you.

Look into that free advice and find time to savor those peaches!

Hugs and blessings,

Lo

Kim said...

Hi Suki, the peaches look heavenly. There is nothing quite like a ripe peach, is there? I love your altar and know it will bring you the focus you need right now. You know, I think you will be good with this probate thing. You are a writer and a woman of words, so you can work through that with less of an issue than others who might be oriented differently. I know you can so do this. I am sure your son will be able to see what has to happen and be okay with it. Sometimes disappointment has a funny way of showing itself, but when he steps back from it he will understand. All those doors will open when they are supposed to do so. Good Luck!

kj said...

i'm sorry for all this weight. i know how it keeps presses even when you try to be steady. but it will get done. you are figuring it out.

i saw a lawyer to help understand my mother's medicaid application and he only charges $ 200. probate can't be that much worse than medicaid, can it? ( i hope not, suki)

one thing i wondered about reading this: do you WANT your son to move in? do YOU want to stay there? you could settle in, or not. what counts is being happy. do that for you, and the ripples will spread

love love
kj

zendotstudio said...

sounds like stressful times! but I hear you making your way through by putting one foot in front of the other, such wise action.

wishing you equanimity as you negotiate your process. may you harvest be as sweet as those peaches. many blessings to you.

mia poe said...

Those peaches are great. It's my favorite fruit too. I love your blog. Thanks for sharing. God bless you.

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charmel tan said...

That peach is like our life. We face problems and able to conquer it. Sometimes we're on top, sometimes we're down.
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Blue Sky Dreaming said...

I have thought of you so often and am holding the best 'outcome' thoughts for you.

marianne said...

I am sorry you had such a busy stressful time dear.
grieving and taking care of his house and your son being angry while you are just being good.....
Oh my....
Hope he sees soon he was wrong. and that all that work and all those decisions are done.
So you can enjoy the good news about your poetry being published.
Take care dear.
Lovely Ganesha shrine you made there.

Julie said...

Dear Suki, My heart goes out to you in the loss of your brother. I am also in probate now with my Mom dying back in May!!! I had to clean out her house as well. It is overwhelming, sad, and difficult. I have so much sorrow for your situation. I hope your son can find somewhere to live that will be better until decisions are made. Best wishes to you! I like your new Shrine to Ganesh!

Julie said...

Oh, yes, and how exciting about your poetry! That is wonderful!!! Congrats!

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