Monday, March 09, 2009

Going away, coming back

A trip to the sound from my last day on the cape. You can't tell, but it was FREEZING due to a fierce wind.

Melting ice on the pond in New Hampshire. Here are some of the highlights of the two weeks.

Looking at cottages. Finding them overpriced and some of them rather shabby. Getting a "reality check." Really liking one cottage but NOT making a offer. Why do I not leap?

Visiting with my friend A who is so kind and helpful with trying to find me a housing solution.

Meeting with the artsit G and buying several of his paintings.

Playing with Romeo and Juliet.

Lunch out (clam chowder) with a famous Cape Cod jeweler, aged 88. Such a dear man. He brought me an orchid flower from his orchid plant and a Cadbury candy bar. His mother, Anne Ellis wrote the book The Life of An Ordinary Woman about her travels from Missouri to Colorado in a covered wagon!!

This is part ice, part water on the pond.

Highlights of my new enthusiasm generated by my trip:

The little Brattleboro house is gone. Sold or off the market.

It is snowing here again.

I am going to apply to the Stonecoast Writers Conference and hopefully study with Annabelle Thomas for 5 days in July re: memoir writing.

I am applying to Snow Farm for the encaustic weekend in May.

I will sort through Mom's glassware, choose what I want, then call the auction man.

I will look at the book of etchings for tombstones and order one for Mom.


How about you? Do you return from a trip with renewed energy. Inspired and motivated??

38 comments:

Artist Unplugged said...

What an awesome post. It appears you gained a great deal from your trip. That first photo even looks cold. You had some wonderful experiences and memories made. Good luck on all your new endeavors and I look forward to reading about them! I've not been on a real trip lately but the online friends have been inspiring my art amazingly! Good to have you back. A couple of tough things you have to do.....

Annie said...

I am always inspired after a trip. It sounds like you had a wonderful time and like you have many joyful adventures planned. Perhaps you did not leap because it was not the right house for you. You won't hesitate when it is.

Lynn said...

Suki, welcome back! I missed your spirit. I love your photos. Burrr.
The cape is cold in winter, huh?
You had such unique experiences all grand. And great plans too.
Yes, I think I often return from trips inspired, usally because I find art materials along the way and look forward to coming home and implimenting them somehow.
The right abode will come. Be patient. I hear its a buyers market right now.

Teri C said...

Welcome back!! We missed you!!

You will do great with the writer as you are already good at it, making everything interesting.

Good luck on the house hunting.
I usually feel tired and rejuvenated after a trip.

Lisa at Greenbow said...

Welcome back. You bet I come home all energized and inspired with life.

It is good that you have looked forward to a writing class. This will keep you from going into the post vacation blues.

Your house hunting I do not envy. It is difficult to move from someplace you have been for many years. It seems so unsettling, however once the decision is made and the move is a go you will feel relief I believe.

Those partially frozen ponds look cold.

Cris, Artist in Oregon said...

Sounds like you had lots of time to think and ponder. Did you take a photo of that Orchid flower???? What a lovely old fashioned gesture. But then at 88 that was his culture. To bad it leaves with that generation.
Maybe you are hoping that you dont have to leave that house in the end is why you cant committ right now.
Glad you got home safely. All good things to take coming up and something to look forward too.

sukipoet said...

Thanks Artist Unplugged. I know it was good to get away from Mom's house, the first time away since she died. Vicarious trips are great too. I am not a big traveler really.

Annie, the truth is that in the early 90's I looked at 100 houses and did not choose. I think the problem is less the house, more within me. I have such a hard time making a decision. I dont think any of these places are worth the amount of money they cost either. Which is a problem. Within myself that is, not in the outer world. I need to let go of that thought.

sukipoet said...

Lynn, the entire north east is cold in the winter but in varying degrees. Up country is way colder for way longer than the southern areaa of the north east.

Teri C. I think you are right, the return has a dual sense to it both of being tired and being energized. My trip involved a lot of lying around though. I did not dash from here to there as many folks do on vacation. So even though I was ill for 4 days, I ended up rested.

sukipoet said...

LIsa, you couldnt know my history, however I have only been in NH, where I am now, for 1 1/2 years, here to take care of my mom who died in Dec. The big trauma happened in 2004 when I had to leave my wonderful 20 year rental. Since then i have lived in 3 other rentals plus at moms. None of these places were "home" where I could unpack and settle in. so, the hard part about leaving Mom's house now my brother's house, is that I am both lazy and also tight fisted. Yet I do want a place where I can unpack, lay down my rugs, hang my pictures etc.

sukipoet said...

cris, I am pretty sure I want to leave Mom's house or now my brother's house. It is just some sort of inertia that is holding me back along with the weather to which I must bow. It slows me down. Yes, the orchid and candy were so sweet. And he even opened the car door for me. When was the last time anyone did that!

Teri and the cats of Furrydance said...

Oh, that first photo...I had to click on it to make sure it wasn't a painting. It's wonderful! The ocean, but cold...a bit desolate but with a blue sky. I really like it.

Inertia is a funny thing, caused by many reasons. For me right now, it's my basement which has been in disarray since the water damage in September. It's almost like I want to feel bad, mad, stagnant.

But this weekend I had 4 days in a row off and got to work on the attic so I can move some of the mess in the basement up there. It's a start...

You trip away sounded wonderful and maybe it will be like a gateway for you to make a move, too. And I don't for a minute think you are lazy, it's that inertia thing, maybe like work avoidance which is what the computer is to me at times.

I have friends who, when they have work to do, never turn on their computer...I just can't do that and the last big work I did was when the construction was going on after the flood and I couldn't get to the computer!

Blue Sky Dreaming said...

I like your energy...good to make these creative decisions and plans. I also like your photo...very feminine, mysterious.
Whenever I was unsure, my mother would smile and tell me I had to learn to "take my best shot". It seemed to encourage me to just move forward.

Wild Somerset Child said...

Your trip away has done you good, Suki, and the fact you have signed up for a writing workshop and one on encaustic (I envy you that) is something to which to look forward. You have been 'refilling the well' as Julia Cameron advises. As to choosing houses, I have a little prompt somewhere in a book on journaling. I''l search it out and let you know what it said. Decisions are so hard.

studio lolo said...

I love that you're using your shadow picture for your new avatar, and I like the rewritten "about me." You have to shake things up sometimes, right?

The blue tones in the photos are soothing even though the temps were cold.

The right house will come along. It will be the one that immediately calls you home.

I'll bet your girls were happy to see you :)

sukipoet said...

Teri, I'm so sorry you had a flood. goodness. NO wonder it is hard to tackle the basement mess. But I must say, do you think there is something significant that you are clearing up the attic?? in order to clear up the basement. Jungians get out your pencils. :) I like the idea of the trip as a gateway. Exactly so. That's how I will think of it. a magic door into the future.

sukipoet said...

BSD, great advice. Take your best shot. I like that as I get to entangled in doing the "right" thing. Yet, I know there is no right thing there is just what one choses and then one amends as one goes along or revises as one goes along.

Anne, the house choice is so hard which is why I havent done it before I think. But now is the chance to face my fears and "demons" and do it anyway despite what "they" say.

sukipoet said...

laurel, I was sure glad to see my girls and they me I think. I did love romeo and juliet though, but hated thinking of my kitties here alone. Maybe it was too long for them. and the house smelled of cat pee. The brother was not on top of things with the kitty litter.

marianne said...

I just returned from Aruba Saturday! Tired, I can´t seem to regain my energy......
Directly after I had 2 busy days so I just got more tired. I have an even more busy week ahead of me.......Next week I will take time to relax.
Brought my Mom home today and for that I spent 4 hours in the car driving her here and back.... In rotterdam I went to her apartment to see the progress and the wallpapering was just finished and looked good. Tomorrow they will put in the carpet. And Wednesday I will buy thinngs and put there. Thursday a course at my work and then we will move Mom´s things.

Your pictures look awesome!!!! Are these colors real or manipulated with a programm?
I see you are in the middle of change....... Do you have to search for a place to live? Or can you stay at your MOms place?

SOunds like your trip has been a good one , but I think you are still in a energy draining situation. This stage where you have to clear away all the things is waiting for me also, but I don´t look forward to it......

Take care Suki!
Big hug!

katie jane said...

Sounds like you have some sort of direction now. I think the time away helped. The writer's conference sounds interesting. I will be interested to hear how that goes. I'm glad you enjoyed your trip, and yes, I am usually inspired after a trip, but then I haven't been on one for a while.

~Babs said...

Lots of fun things to do coming up in your life,,,super!
I hope you'll show us the paintings you bought!
I sure do like your shadow portrait,,it is so cool! Here's a thought for you, for whatever it's worth:
Maybe it's the idea of OWNING a home (with all that entails) that holds you back. It is a large committment of up-keep and continual care. (read money) Maybe in these uncertain times it would be the best idea to rent. My sister 'lost' her home, is now renting,,,and doesn't anymore feel that burden that does come with ownership. Were I alone, I really think I'd opt to rent,since I'd be unable to do the kinds of things around the house myself that need doing.I'd shudder to think how fast savings could go into repairs and upkeep.
The plumbing problem we had not long ago was a HUGE cost. If you rent, and a really great buy appeared,one you couldn't pass up,,, you could always buy then.
Just something to think about, and forgive me if I overstep.

m. heart said...

ooooh, i hope you come up this way to snow farm and i will come by and distract you! :) these are inspiring and wonderful plans you have.

patti said...

You achieved so much Suki. It may not feel like it now, but once all your experinces have time to meld in your head, you will know which way to go.

Your gentleman friend sounds very interesting.

willow said...

Happy to hear you are home safe and sound. There's no place like home, huh? I always feel inspired when I get back in my element after being away. It makes me appreciate it more.

Jude said...

Glad to see you're back after your adventure. Tight fisted, you???
Well, I don't know what to say, maybe just,keep looking, the right place may be closer than you think.........

sukipoet said...

Marianne, my goodness, you are so busy and have so many responsibilities right now. Just one of those would lay me flat. Sending blessings and remember to take care of yourself in all that you do. Mom's house now belongs to my brother. I dont want to stay here. Re: photos I do not have a photo manipulating program. I just point, shoot and post.

sukipoet said...

Katie Jane, the writers thing isnt till July. It snowed the day after I arrived home which reminded me yet again why I dont like the north country. :) Hope you get a fun trip soon!

Babs, thanks for your thoughts. I have rented for years but in my 20 year rental I only paid $300 a month. NOw rents are $1200 plus a month. I agree that home ownership feels a bit daunting money wise. Yet if I rent I am at the mercy of the landlord who can tell me that I have to move as heshe wants to do whatever with their house. It is a hard balance but I think I want to try home ownership now as opposed to renting. At any rate i may end up doing what you say, renting and still looking for a purchase. There are so many things to take into consideration that I get myself confused. I'll try to photo the purchased paintings again. I tried once and they came out faint or something.

sukipoet said...

m. heart, oh it would be such fun to meet you.

Patti thanks for the encouragement.

Willow, yes. There is that sense of appreciating home and ones own furniture and doo dads. Also when i stay at someone else's house I feel I have to be cleaning all the time. This house was one of those spotless places with no junk piled anywhere etc. Am glad to relax with my small piles of things.

sukipoet said...

Jude thanks for the chuckle and your encouragement. I can be sooo tight fisted at the same time as fairly generous too. Odd.

willow said...

Just popped over this morning to say that your new shadow shot makes a fabulous avatar!! :^)

Debbie in CA : ) said...

Though I love to travel and always return home with a renewed perspective of away and home, I am a homebody by nature. My homebody nature developed when I found my first "home sweet home" -- a safe place to dream, live, love, and enJOY. (Incidentally, you don't need an owner's deed to this kind of place; a rental agreement works, too.)

I enjoyed the measured pace of this post, with an emphasis on the daily activity and the nourishment therein. We gain courage in our routine and can grow to grasp a new dream when we feel confident.

Dream of a home sweet home and you will find it. When we bought this house we had looked for months (literally) and then one day I saw a video of this cottage and agreed, it was the one. I never saw it before I arrived with the moving van. Crazy? NO! Destiny, yes.

He has plans for you . . . to prosper and not harm you. Rest in Him, sweet friend. Your heart will cry "Yes!" when you find the right cottage at the right time . . . when you want it to be so. Have faith. : D

sukipoet said...

Thanks Willow. It is hard to believe that yellow light is natural light, coming from the western setting sun.

Debbie thanks for sharing your thoughts on travel and home. I love to be home too and make a cosy nest. I have had one rental home anyway that was quite lovely and cosy. I just dont want to have to move again though. So i hope to buy this time. Thank you for your prayers and thoughts. Be well, suki That's a miracle, the way you found your home! Wow.

soulbrush said...

sooooo glad you're back, how silly of me, you live far away anyway, but you felt sooo far away from me.i come back from a trip, tired and so happy to be home but not enervated, how interesting. i do like your ideas and your plans, and look forward to hearing about them, specially the memoir writing course/seminar. huggles my friend and so happy to 'see' you back. and i do like your shadowy new avatar pic too.

kj said...

suki, i'll be back to comment. in the meantime, please stop by my blog when you have a chance. there's an award there for you.

sukipoet said...

Thanks Soulbrush. Today I am very tired, still a kickback from the travel. NOw I am thinking I should drive more, if the momentum gives me energy. Actually, when I was on Cape Cod I was closer to you and in fact I think I almost saw England when I stood at the Sound. :)

sukipoet said...

kj ok. thanks.

Natalya said...

nice to have you back! and nice to catch up on your adventures...

human being said...

oh i forgot what i wanted to write the moment i saw the word verification:
amsync... am sync

these goings and returns are the best way to synchronize, aren't they?
:)

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